So it’s the Wedding Day, 20th June has come around quickly. I remember the day that Amy (Rebecca’s friend) dropped off the pre, pre, pre wedding invitation in the form of a fridge magnet so that we would remember the date. It’s still on our beer fridge door now. I remember thinking that this day was a long way off and I wondered what we would all be doing around that date. Now this leads me to believe that the saying ‘we are better off not knowing what’s coming’ is very true as I wouldn’t have believed how my life has changed. So it’s all preparations tonight for tomorrow, well I’ve painted my nails so that’s at least a start. Tonight I took my last chemo tablets for a week, it’s a week off for me 🙂 before we start cycle number 2 intravenously on Friday 26th June. So I’m hoping for a feeling normal week.
So having been to see Dr Weaver I now have laxatives to add to my collection of drugs. He did agree with me that I should take them after the wedding as shitting myself in church was not something any of us would like to happen and it’s just rude to up stage the bride. He didn’t actually say that but it was what I was thinking. So normally I would go and buy a new dress for a wedding but I have a big problem and that is my stomach. Those that know me know I’m a size 8 -10 now the rest of my body hasn’t changed so I just look pregnant, no seriously I do. I thought I was gaining weight due to the steroids but no one can put a stone on in a week. Dr Weaver said my bloating was caused by the drugs, and so gave me more drugs. Now the only new clothes that I would be able to buy for this wedding now would be from a maternity section, as I really do look pregnant. Until my body starts to right itself, shall we say. So no new clothes for me but I do have my daisy dress which was brought recently with Leanne prior to my holiday pre chemo with Steve. We were only out shopping for about 2 hours but she nearly killed me. We returned home to Leanne saying that she had broken me, I could hardly walk, so we both fell asleep together outside in the sunshine to recover.
Anyway it’s the daisy dress for me tomorrow however the front daisies may look more like bloody sunflowers but who cares at least I will have made it to the day itself as Rebecca once said that ‘I might not make it’ bless her. I don’t watch Coronation Street but my mom told me that Eileen wore the same dress to Gail’s wedding. I do hope there isn’t more than one daisy dress today, every woman’s worst nightmare hey and wardrobe disaster.
The best question ever – so after my results today, whilst lots of friends offered to call me if I needed them (thanks you lovely people) I just didn’t want to talk about it really. Writing the blog is a great way of putting all the information down and then just texting “posts up” and then everyone can absorb the details. So I’m sat in my ‘chemo gazebo’ with Steve and my phone goes off, it’s a text message from my step daughter. It said “can I ask you a question?” I said to Steve that I was worried what was coming next, was she in trouble? and was I going to be able to help her? I replied “that of course she could, that I was always here for her and how could I help?” nothing came back for a few minutes and then my phone went again, the best question ever
“Are you going to die?”
Oh bless her, at first it made me smile as I was impressed with her honesty and courage in just coming out with it. Instead of us as adults either not talking about it or skirting around the question, ‘she went bravely where no man had been before’ that’s from Star Trek I think! Oh well Steve will put me right on Star Trek quotes – Trekkie.
So I sent her a long suitable and honest reply. Nothing came back. Was she upset, was she not expecting the reply I gave, was she angry or just in the shower! Whilst waiting for her reply I was talking to Steve about my worries over Lauren and her question. He said that as long as her reply didn’t come in saying “well can I have your jewellery then”? it would be okay. Now that one really did make me laugh out loud Steve. She did text back and don’t worry she was okay and never mentioned my jewellery LOL.
Now I’m posting this after midnight as I won’t be able to post on the day due to the Wedding however I have planned a break for myself, to come home and rest before the evening do. Let’s hope I have the energy to return to the celebrations as it would be lovely to have a dance again. I can’t remember the last time I danced!…… Oh yes I do it was the works Christmas party. I would say fond memories and there were some but some of the staff were a little ‘worse for wear’ and it was a laugh but hard work too, and unbeknown to me I had Harry growing inside me. Anyway I shall miss not posting as I normally do so daisy dress pregnancy photo’s to follow on Sunday 🙂
Thinking of you Wendy …. You can do this !!! Don’t give in.
Thank you for your support and encouragement. I am going to do my best for all my loved ones and to be a positive story/outcome to inspire others xxx