Feeling Loved and not alone :-)

Saturday 18th July – What’s that saying? Oh that’s it, ” what a difference 24 hours can make,” how true. So last night I went to bed at 1.30 but was awake by 5.30, 4 hours that’s not bad. You all know the routine, feed the animals, coffee fag and this morning it was a Milk Tray chocolate. A thank you gift from our neighbour with the baby. Who brought me a thank you card and present for the present I brought her. Do I now have to send a thank you card for the thank you card she sent me???? We are all funny don’t you think!

Hi Pete from us all in England xx
Hi Pete from us all in England xx

I logged on to Facebook and I had a message from Uncle Pete, finally word from him. I started to cry instantly as I read his words but this isn’t good when you are on chemo as your eyes are just so painful. I quickly send him a message that I need to just have time to stop crying and then I’ll reply. He is still in hospital, they are filling him with antibiotics, he has the viral meningitis but he is a little better. Thank God, thank Rita for her prayers and I’m just so happy to hear from him. I know that when Rebecca and Richard wake they will also be comforted that they can read his words to them as he made it a group chat with them.

My next lovely surprise was from Heather who has 3 children but sadly lost Simon at just 9 months old.Β  I got to know their family via Richard playing football. She also sent me some clippings that she had sent a friend when they were going through cancer, and a lovely card. She like many others knows raw grief from losing a child. We are not alone are we?

The postman then arrives from Semin who I worked with in Oxford Street. She left BHS and started her own business. A box full of beautiful cookies all hand made. Thank Semin and we will talk soon, looking forward to it πŸ™‚

Thoughtful Gifts
Thoughtful Gifts

Steve has decided to construct a run for Molly which starts in the chemo gazebo and ends in the garden so that she can play by herself. He does this as Molly loves her ball but when I’m on chemo it’s hard to keep throwing balls as she never brings them right to you. I need a dog psychologist as she will take her ball to any strangers feet when we are out but not us, weird dog. Steve returns with all the bits and it’s cost him Β£65!!! Here is my mom trying to teach Molly how to use it:

Famous Chemo Gazebo photo with Richard & Toon
Famous Chemo Gazebo photo with Richard & Toon

Then I had a text from Richard that he was coming round for a few hours with his mate Toon. They arrived at around 2 pm, we had lunch but as ever I fell asleep. Richard played with Toon and Steve on Mario Kart which meant a lot to Steve whilst I slept. Normal is good, normal fun stuff is really good and it helps all of us, thank you Richard for coming to see me, even if I embarrassed you but hey I’m your mom and that’s my job, lol xx



On my boy's bike :-)
On my boy’s bike πŸ™‚
Me on my bike :-)
Me on my bike πŸ™‚

I post up my blog early yesterday as I can’t change it once it’s up and the admission of shitting myself to you all was hard. I was shocked at how many of you have experienced this. First admission was from Mrs Poo Pants, who was encouraged to smoke drugs by her partner and as she had never done this before. As she smoked the weed she had stomach cramps, went to fart and shit herself. She had tight jeans on and it flowed over the back of them. Now this story made me smile as she said she had never told anyone before. Now I’ve made sure the world can see it lol but I won’t give your real name πŸ™‚

Rebecca pops out to town and comes home with a dress for me andΒ  a new dog jigsaw for her nan. Last night she was very late home from her trip into London but returned with a box of flowers for me, she is so lovely.

Well done to you all xx
Well done to you all xx

My lovely cousin Nicky has done a mud run challenge to raise money for cancer with her work colleagues and again she placed my name and website on her back, thank you everyone who took part in this. Now I think that you all look like you have shit yourselves haha




Baby Jacob Guy doing well
Baby Jacob Guy doing well

Then I get an update on little Jacob Guy, our new nephew born 9 weeks premature and he is doing okay now. Thank God again hey.






Finally I get a lovely message from the Juddy’s and they are coming for Sunday dinner tomorrow. It’s been too long since we saw them, oh how time flies and we are always too busy, I think I have learnt to take more time for important stuff, well to balance life more when I get back to normal, back to work, back to being me. So famous chemo gazebo photos will here soon.

So Rita on the prayer list for you is Karen, Pete, Jacob and anyone out there who has had the embarrassment of shitting themselves.

Sunday 19th July – Slept for nearly 6 hours, wow I can’t remember the last time I slept for that long. My sleep was intermittent due to sweating throughout the night. Is this the chemo or the ‘change of life’ another side effect from the chemo? It’s raining but due to stop and be a lovely day. I hope so as the Juddys are coming to have lunch with us today :-). It’s Mother Teresa’s (Rita) birthday today so I send her a birthday greeting via Facebook and save the date on my phone so that I don’t forget next year.


Rita confirms candles and prayers for us all and sends photos again to prove it. Cheers Rita and everyone else who thinks of me and my family, it really means so much.




With confirmation that Juddy hugs are on the way, we set out for extra food. The journey is difficult for me, my hands and feet are so bad I can’t drive. They are due at 2 pm as the plan is home for midday, sleep and then i will be okay for a few hours. They are delayed on the motorway by 3 accidents and don’t arrive until 4 pm. It’s been 12 long years since I have seen them all but from the moment they walked through the door it was just magical. Juddy hugs had arrived. We relived such precious memories, talked for hours and the special friendship between us was as natural as it had always been. We laughed and laughed, looked at old photos and video footage. Such special people to me, so why the years of not seeing each other? Life and distance got in the way and I’m so sorry. Please if reading this and you think of old friends that you send Christmas cards to and every year you think, I must get in touch but don’t, DO IT – DON”T WAIT ANOTHER YEAR! Cos that turns into another year and another.

It was so hard to see them leave, I can’t cry cos my eye balls would explode but I feel the emotion of seeing them again, sharing moments together that I will hold in my heart until I can have Juddy Hugs again, thank you for making my day.

Juddy Love
Juddy Love


Ian trying to open a beer at lunch with the now famous penis bottle opener from Mary Poppins





The famous chemo Gazebo shot :-) with Arnold and Leia
The famous chemo Gazebo shot πŸ™‚ with Arnold and Leia


On a serious note, Richard crashed his motorbike, he’s okay, but his bike isn’t. More chuffing candles needed Mother Theresa, LOL.

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Married to Steve, I have two children - Rebecca and Richard. Steve has two children, Lauren and Chris. Rebecca lives with us (nurse Rebecca) and my mom Judy also has become nurse and housekeeper but lives in the West Midlands. My son is in the Army and comes home when he can. I am 47, born in 1967 and I was told I had bowel cancer on 22nd Feb 2015 and this blog is my journey through it. I hope it helps you as you were the reason I started it.

7 thoughts on “Feeling Loved and not alone :-)”

  1. Thank goodness for Rita and her prayers of protection over your family, Richard’s accident could have been so much worse. Great blog today, I laughed out loud

    1. Glad you liked it and sorry for the delay in getting it on line, long day but needed final photos to complete it in the now famous chemo gazebo lol xx

  2. Well you’ve had a wonderful day then I’m so very pleased πŸ™‚ x
    Lots of visitors & Love x
    Hopefully you will sleep well tonight x
    So pleased to hear baby Jacob & uncle Pete are doing well x
    Loves & Hugs Always xxx
    You had me blooming worried this evening!!!
    Not to mention the nation waiting for your blog , sort your editors out lol
    Might that be the lovely Steve & Judy? Lol xxx

    1. Yep Steve and Judy are the editors, bless them. I will hopefully sleep tonight after such a precious day. Thanks for the candles and prayers again xxx

  3. missing you already was so lovely to spend quality time together my kids think you are awesome lol, leia cried on the way home but you now know thats a good thing shes finds it really difficult to allow herself to show emotion thanku for reaching out to her. and i want to say a special thank you to Judy,Steve and Rebecca for giving up their afternoon of special moments with you to share it with us Juddy’s it means the world to us as you do love and Juddy hugs always xxxx
    p.s you look fab on a motorbike πŸ˜‰ LOVE YOU x

    1. I will pass your comments on to them. Glad the kids weren’t bored and enjoyed beating Steve at Mario Kart, he’s a good loser and used to it with our kids. I think it’s an age thing. Always loved the Juddy hugs. Thanks for your comments here on the blog as your words will always be here for us to read and remember a great day. xxx

  4. so great to see the Juddys again and to feel their love and support for Wendy. I was very touched that they brought me some flowers. Wendy had a good time with them on what could have been a hard day so thank you

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