Now and Then

Okay so I left you for a pork Sunday lunch, yummy πŸ™‚ thanks mom.Β  Now Steve is on the early shift at work going into the office, so he goes to bed at 11 pm and with everyone asleep I have time to reply and catch up with you all, my favourite game of ‘wack a comment’. I do this and just rest in my dream machine chair. After a few hours, well it was 2.20 am I decide that I have to get some sleep, oh why can’t I sleep? So I get changed and head to the dining room, with a slight smile of remembering the earlier scenes of flying breakfasts and smashed lips from that morning. I try to sleep but due to the pain in my back I give up at 2.50 am and I head back to the kitchen to get a fresh hot water bottle to ease the pain of laying flat as it’s just too painful. I then think ‘right you bastard’ I’ll have you, I’ll take 3 ml of oral morphine too just to take the edge off the pain and then I’ll sleep. So back to bed I go and sleep finally comes to me. Then blow me I wake at 4.30, why? why? why?

I give up trying to sleep and head to the kitchen back to my chair with the all important coffee, 1/2 biscuit and a fag and I’m sorted, ready to start today’s ramblings for you all. I thought I’d start early as who knows what accidents may happen in the day that may prevent me posting this up.

So before I continue with how the day actually went I need to share some changes that have happened in the house since I have had my dream machine chair. Tia the forever ungrateful rescued cat has got used to my early rising and no longer thinks it’s a reasonable hour to wake up for breakfast but instead she wanders in not asking for food but she does now think that my chair and my lap are there just for her. She comes and sits with me and we take on the look of ‘Blofeld’ from the Bond Movies as he only ever stroked the back of his cat’s head. We do this whilst she purrs away until out of the blue she just hisses at me and jumps off, why? why? why? Like my sleeping patterns will I ever understand her?

Molly never wakes up when I do to say hello or to demand food. Why don’t I have normal animals? When she does decide to eat she takes one biscuit at a time carries it to the back door mat and eats it and then returns again and again until she has finished. I’ve never known a less greedy dog! I think they all needΒ  specialist help, or I certainly do just to understand them.

No sightings on ‘Spike the Squirrel’ for you I am sorry to report, or is this just because I spend all my days in my dream machine with Steve in the kitchen with a restricted view of my garden and the bloody thieving ball snatching pest has been going unnoticed!

So back to today and first thing first is the usual drug list to follow before I can even eat. Tummy lining tablet first, which you can’t have food with but 1/2 biscuit is fine I think haha. I go for a 1/4 of a biscuit this time as I’ve already had half and gosh before you know it, I’ll have eaten a whole one, oh the decadence of my life hey.

So whilst I’m waiting for an hour before I start taking the slow release morphine tablets I have time to share the ‘then’ part of the post.

My 18th Birthday start of the pub crawl evening photo

My 18th Birthday start of the pub crawl evening photo
My 18th Birthday, pre pub crawl photo πŸ™‚

So, Nicky brought with her some old photos that I’d never seen and ones I do remember this weekend. One of my favourite ones was taken outside Lynne’s house in Stallings Lane (for all you Kingswinford followers) It was my 18th Birthday and a pub crawl was planned through Kingswinford and ending up in Wall Heath. We all do these silly nights out when growing up and I like others are sometimes thankful there was no Facebook to record all our wild times as OMG we certainly had lots. Anyway Nicky was working so we Lynne, Lisa and I went to the fancy dress hire shop and chose the outfits. I’m Andy Pandy, covered up, very sensible, Lynne is Prince Charming, very glamorous, Lisa is Donald Duck for comedy value and my poor poor poor dear friend Nicky was ‘Bondage Girl’ we agreed to tell her it was the only thing that would fit her and that was all that they had left in the shop. Poor Nicky, just look how happy she is to spend the night getting bladdered in front of all our friends dressed as a Bondage Girl, this is so not her at all but she did it for me, for my birthday as that’s what friends do and I only told her on our recent holiday that it was a lie and we chose it just for the laugh. Now that’s not a nice thing for us all to do, but I’m not sorry as I have the memories of that night and my best mate doing her very best to look the part for me and hating every moment.

Ronald McDonald day at MerryHill
Ronald McDonald day at MerryHill

The next photo Nicky isn’t in it but probably took it and I’ve included it as that’s where we met at McDonalds Merry Hill (or Merry Hell, as I like to call it) It was a drive through, that was wow at the time, very modern and new. The day was for the actual Ronald McDonald visit to us. We all dressed up and had a great day. Ronald McDonald in those days was actually an actor. Now the day went really well but I do have a confession to make about that day. We were coming up to our 40,000th customer or some number like that and the prize was if you were that customer you got a free meal and your photo in the local press. Now I was in charge of counting who that was. Now standing ready to pounce some dodgy looking customers came in and although the number had arrived and they were the winners I waited until a nice looking family came through the door and pounced on them. So sorry but confession done now after all those years of denying someone a prize they deserved just because I decided they didn’t look right, oh the shame! So don’t tell anyone hey, our secret.

Yoghurt legs yummy!
Yoghurt legs yummy!

The third one I’m putting up is just because I like it. We were early/mid (more mid if I’m honest) 20’s I had got Rebecca & Richard. Nicky if you look closely has yoghurt on her legs as she burnt them and we covered her legs in natural yoghurt to ease the pain. An old Greek tip for sunburn but she looked so stunning carrying the dried up yoghurt on the legs look, sorry Nicky I should have just given you after sun but yoghurt just looks so good dried on and flaky, very sexy πŸ™‚

Oh 7 am tablet time, so back in a minute.

Our day went really well and apart from trip to John Lewis where I was stubborn and tried to walk with my stick and ended in pain all afternoon it’s going well. I brought mom a light for her new room and only picked up the wrong finish so poor mom had to return to change it on her own as I couldn’t face the driving again. Now the letter came this morning to says that I can cash in my M&S pension, great news as I can pay mom back for Daisy Den, Hot Tub will be in by the weekend and by the time all that’s done it’s almost gone, so no begging letters to me but the ‘Bank of Mom’ will be back open for business πŸ™‚ So pleased that I can pay her back quickly for Daisy Den.

So it’s now 5 pm and we are still waiting for the carpet to arrive, we are obviously the last job of the day so I’m signing off as any minute now they will be here and it will be all steam ahead to make my mom’s room a haven of peace for her to relax in.

Hope you all had a great Monday as all in all I haven’t impaled myself on anything, no other accidents and courtesy of Keith, Nicky’s husband we have fresh trout for tea, life sometimes is really good and today has been a really good day here. Catch you all tomorrow xxx


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Married to Steve, I have two children - Rebecca and Richard. Steve has two children, Lauren and Chris. Rebecca lives with us (nurse Rebecca) and my mom Judy also has become nurse and housekeeper but lives in the West Midlands. My son is in the Army and comes home when he can. I am 47, born in 1967 and I was told I had bowel cancer on 22nd Feb 2015 and this blog is my journey through it. I hope it helps you as you were the reason I started it.

23 thoughts on “Now and Then”

  1. Oh Wendy so good to hear you have had a good day shame about the lack of sleep hope tonight will be better. Love the photos it’s lovely to look back on old photos because they always bring back good memories. Look forward to seeing you tomorrow I hope you have a good night XXX

    1. yes a good day and looking forward to seeing you and Ann. Mom’s room will look fab too when finished. Old photos are precious hey πŸ™‚ lunch on me tomorrow, defo my turn x

  2. Hi Wendy sounds like another eventful day but I bet your mom will love her little piece of sanctuary.
    I’m so glad you can have your M and S pension as worrying about money must be hard when you have enough to worry about. Atleast you can get the Hot Tub now . Have you seen the film Hot Tub Time Machine? I think of that film when you mention the hot tub ha ha let’s all travel back to the 80s… free stress free fun times.
    Anyway here’s to happy hot tub times. Much love to you all xxx

    1. It just means so much to get the things me and the family need but also sad as the pro’s are saying I’ve got less then 12 months so I have shed tears too. Haven’t seen the film but like the idea of care free, stress free times xx

  3. The man from M&S he say yah! That is such good news at last. Wow your garden is certainly filling up, Daisy Den and a hot tub.
    Just leave a little room for Molly dog and her ball.
    Hope your lovely mum is ok today after her fall, can’t have bank of mum laid up now can we.
    We miss you and your up beat go get ’em Wendy, Christmas shop was lacking your creative side, although Wenemma did an outstanding job. I remember last year in your new canvas shoes blisters and all, ha ha ha miss those hilarious days.
    Hope your mum’s carpet went in with no hitches.

    1. I thought it was the man from Deltmonty that said yes but hey who cares as he said yes but this means that the pro’s are agreeing that I only have 12 months left so I have been sad too. Still room for Molly but only just as the garden is shrinking πŸ™‚ Mom is better thanks but she does too much for her age trying to help out.
      Christmas shop last year and those bloody shoes lol lol I have every faith in the Wemma she is amazing and I miss working with her and you all xxx

  4. So glad you’re getting a hot tub at last…you’re face after you’d been in the pool at the conference was a perfect picture of no pain. You deserve that every day ❀️
    Lots of love for you daily from the Isle of Wight ❀️

    1. Hi Sue, I’m so looking forward to it I can’t tell you. The thought of being pain free in water for 20 minutes instead of keep loading myself with drugs is something I am so excited about. I just get so down feeling ill all the time but hey that’s cancer and chemo for you, it’s a awful combination and will never make it on a cocktail bar list hey, lol xx

  5. Ok, you can close the Bank of Mom and open up the Hot Pool at Β£100 per 5 minutes to all your friends!!! Will there be a grand opening? So exciting. We are running hard to stand still here but hope to emerge, like the White Rabbit, soon. Glad to hear that the day was ok and there were no Breakfast Moments! Xxxxx

    1. No breakfast moments at all. Bring your swimsuit if you come round you may just like it and send Ian off to the hot tub shop yourself πŸ™‚ I think your pricing structure is a little on the ambitious side but I like an entrepreneur xxx

  6. Thanks wend for sharing those lovely pics!! Lol. Hope your moms carpet was fitted with no hitches. I can’t believe you didn’t sleep again after sleeping so little Saturday night. Bummer. Glad you had a less eventful day today. Lol!! Love to all. Xxx

    1. My pleasure mate to share them ha ha carpet fitted πŸ™‚ love to you all too. OMG the trout was amazing everyone loved it especially Tia – now she was grateful I couldn’t manage all of mine, finally some gratitude lol xxx

      1. Such brilliant memoris wend. You forget how young we were when we met. It’s been a pleasure mate. Many more memories to come I hope. Beth is especially looking forward to hot tub memories. Lol!!! Loads of love. Xx

  7. Hot Tub? I thought you were ‘just looking’? ha ha. Ooooh it’ll be blooming lovely for you all.

    I couldn’t help having a chuckle at last night’s post. The bit where you said “let out a little wee wee” really tickled me and so did Alison saying that if Steve’s hair was longer the electrocution would have made it curly.

    The photos were fab xx

    1. I know it was a funny old day. I never just look if I am serious about what I want, I’m a woman on a mission to beat this bloody disease and just the ability to be pain free without drugs is worth every penny to me. The blue tooth speakers and neno lights are getting everyone else excited too but for me sanity is important and that’s why I am being a little selfish here as being in pain all the time is just so hard sometimes.
      Alison told me to buy some Tena lady now she is supposed to be a friend lol xx

  8. I’m so pleased everything is falling into place my lovely.
    What’s the update with Daisy Den? It must be coming up to delivery due date πŸ™‚
    I loved your pictures & tales of yesteryear, blessed with great friends and lovely memories of a young girl on the approach of adulthood. Amazing and so very special don’t you think.

    Memories are so very special they are our history and some times it’s just so beautiful to just sit and reminisce it’s like rolling a film in your mind and recollecting times and places and being in the moment, at times scents, music & deja vu triggers our memories creating a wonderful reflection of us and the lives we have lived. πŸ™‚

    I hope your mom’s room has been completed and she has her own Judy Den x Another tick in the box for Trendy Wendy, mission accomplished xxx

    Sleep & pain still cause mayhem in your daily challenges my lovely which saddens me, if only we could nail those 2 suckers would make everything else more bearable x
    Yet you soldier on with true grit & determination xx
    Keep rockin the chemo xxx

    Loves & Hugs xxxxx

    1. Hi my angel as ever your words are thoughtful and lovely. I adore the Judy Den and I can’t wait to tell her tomorrow morning, she will laugh, I may just have to by her a door plague :-)))
      History shapes who we are today, fact and yes very precious to just reflect and laugh.
      Sleep is really getting to me too and maybe you are the only person I should be sleeping with as I had 5 hours at conference, unheard of. Tell Mark I’m moving in lol lol xxx

    1. Nor me :-)))) shame hot tub not in until Wednesday but next time you pop in you really can pop in ha ha ease those overworked limbs xxx

  9. SO happy for you about the hot tub!! That is fantastic news that sort of makes up for the crap day on Sunday. Now maybe you guys can hop in it on Wednesday, relax and steam some stress and aches away. You deserve a break huh?!

  10. Glad you had a better day…great news about M & S pension enjoy that hot tub..lovely photos and lovely memories for you and Nicky xxxx

  11. hi Wendy. hot tub sounds just the thing for you, when is daisy den coming?. you wont know wether to relax in your chair, pose in daisy den or float in your hot tub. ha ha. it will be hard to pick which one to try first. I should think that the pain free hot tub will be the outright winner, enjoy. thinking about you and the family. love as always. xxxxxx

    1. My wonderful Aunty Shelia I’m doing the lot with you, bring your swimming gear, we are going wrinkly together lol. I’ll chase Daisy Den again tomorrow as the didn’t return my call so I’ll be on it tomorrow for you. See you soon I hope, love ya xxx

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